Most popular
The Intro
A podcast or stream opener that sounds like the entire room should stop talking.
$99
Up to 45 seconds · Clean WAV + MP3 · Personal use
Custom voice drops · Recorded by a human
The ceremony has arrived. It is announcing you.
Broadcast-quality voice drops from a working live-ceremony announcer and AAA game voice actor—for podcasts, entrances, voicemails and beautifully excessive gifts.
Delivered by email within 72 hours. One revision included.
Tonight’s announcement
Someone paid me to announce their cat.
100% humanPersonally performed, never synthesized.
72-hour deliveryFinished digital audio, sent to your inbox.
Studio qualityClean files and one revision included.
How it works
From ordinary script to main-event energy.
I announce live, elite award ceremonies and voice characters in games you have almost certainly played. Now that ceremonial voice can say your name like it matters—because it does.
- 01
Pick your drop
Choose the format that fits the occasion, from voicemail to grand entrance.
- 02
Send the words
Provide your script, names and pronunciation notes—or add scriptwriting for $25.
- 03
Receive the performance
Broadcast-quality audio lands in your inbox within 72 hours.
- 04
Play at maximum volume
Deploy the gravitas responsibly. Or do not. The file is yours forever.
The program
Choose your level of consequence.
Every personal-use package is custom recorded and delivered digitally. No shipping. No generic templates. No robotic approximation of grandeur.
The Voicemail
$49
A custom greeting that makes every missed call feel consequential.
Up to 30 seconds
The Ceremonial Roast
$79
A loved one announced with red-carpet gravitas and just enough menace.
Gift-ready audio
The Grand Entrance
$149
For weddings, parties, campaigns and entrances too important for a normal voice.
Up to 60 seconds
For brands and monetized work
Commercial License
Advertising, business use and paid campaigns are quoted to scope.
From $500
Request a quotePreparing the order book…
Scriptwriting add-on: +$2524-hour rush: +$50One revision included
Fine print, clearly announced
Questions before your entrance?
Is this really a human recording it?+
Yes. Every premium drop is recorded personally in a professional studio.
Can I request a specific tone?+
Absolutely—regal, warm, ominous, game-trailer epic or full awards-show.
Can I use this in ads or monetized content?+
Personal-tier drops are for personal use. Commercial work requires a Commercial License.
What if pronunciation matters?+
Checkout includes pronunciation notes. Phonetic spellings and reference recordings are welcome.
What about revisions and refunds?+
Every order includes one free revision. Because the audio is custom, refunds are unavailable after delivery.
Ladies, gentlemen and group chats
Your name deserves an entrance.
Send the words. I will supply the authority, timing and entirely disproportionate grandeur.
Commission your drop